Critical analysis of Nursing scenario Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 1000 words

Critical analysis of Nursing scenario - Essay Example This paper will discuss a particular nursing workplace conflict scenario and suggest potential solutions to address the situation using an effective conflict resolution tool. Critical Analysis The given scenario clearly reveals that there are numerous issues existing in the workplace, the key reason leading to frequent sick calls, tardiness, and lack of productivity. The conversation between Susan Barnes and Shawna Hayes clearly indicates that team formation and job distribution is poorly managed and this situation in turn results in weak employee satisfaction. Due to pitfalls in team formation, members of Team 2 experience increased work stress whereas Team 1 members obtain a more relaxed worksite environment. In addition, some nurses always manage to work with Team 2 to avoid workload and the resulting job stress. Evidently, this situation is severely affecting team collaboration and the spirit of team work and this is most likely to end up in poor quality patient care. Finally, in adequate remuneration is also a major reason causing poor staff satisfaction; employees are greatly discouraged because they are not paid proportionate to the workload they bear. While analyzing the given case context, it is clear that the conflict situation is organizational because it is caused by improper management practices. It is necessary for the nursing manager to exercise due care while addressing an organisational conflict situation. According to Kelly and Crawford, there are mainly seven conflict resolution techniques such as avoiding, accommodating, competing, compromising, negotiating, collaborating, and confronting. In the words of Coburn (n.d.), under avoiding strategy, the conflict is simply ignored whereas the accommodating strategy implies that one side gives in to the other side to resolve the conflict. Ogunyemi et al (2010) state that the tool of competing forces the parties involved in the conflict to compete for the goal, while compromising tool encourages each side to give up something and gain something. In the view of Sontor (2009), the manager uses the negotiating tool to organize high level discussion that seeks agreement but not necessarily consensus. According to Khanaki and Hassanzadeh (2010), the collaborating tool persuades both sides to work together so as to develop the optimal outcome whereas the confronting approach takes immediate and obvious efforts to stop conflict at the very start (p.na). In the current situation, tools like avoiding, accommodating, competing, compromising, collaborating, or confronting may not be effective because the issues are well rooted, and hence need stronger and more extensive resolution approach. Therefore, it is advisable for the nursing unit manager to employ the negotiating tool to address the conflict situation identified. The major advantage of using this conflict resolution tool is that the solution developed will be permanent â€Å"for a variety of reasons, such as a union of contract, a permanent change in policy or governance, or career or life changes† (Kelly & Crawford, p.304). In the view of Lewicki, Hiam, and Olander, â€Å"there are five basic approaches to negotiating: collaborative (win-win), competitive (win at all costs), avoiding (lose-lose), accommodating (lose to win), and compromise (split the difference)† (as cited Kelly & Crawford, p.304). It would be better to employ the compromise-negotiating tool to

Saving the Pacific Salmon Essay Example for Free

Saving the Pacific Salmon Essay Salmon are one of the most important fish species in the world, and in the Pacific Northwest the fish are a way of life for many species of plants and animals, including humans. The major problem that humans are facing is that the population of wild salmon is dangerously low as compared to historic numbers due to over-fishing and human degradation (including dams, chemical pollution and land use impacts. ). Pacific Salmon are now extinct in forty percent of the rivers they once thrived in (Four Fish). Zoologist George Suckley stated in 1854, that the Pacific coast salmon were â€Å"one of the striking wonders of the region these fish. astonish by number, and confuse with variety. †(In a Sea of Trouble) and that â€Å"The quantities for salmon which frequent these waters is beyond calculation, and seems to be so great as to challenge human ingenuity to effect it in any way. † (In a Sea of Trouble). In order to get a better grasp on the problems humans are causing we need to first understand the salmons life cycle. In the Pacific Northwest there are five different species of salmon: Chinook, Pink, Dog, Coho, and Silver. All of which are anadromous basically meaning that they live in both fresh and salt water. These fish start life hatching many miles upstream on the gravel beds in rivers on the pacific coasts of North America, and Asia, were they grow into smolts as they are carried downstream to the sea. Once at sea the salmon spend one to seven years maturing. Then for reasons unknown to scientists, a homing impulse triggers them to make an astonishing journey back to the very river or tributary they were hatched in (Salmon). At least that is how it is supposed to work. When Lewis and Clark made their famous expedition nearly two centuries ago they marveled at the â€Å"great quants. of Salmon† they had seen in the Columbia River in Washington State, which in 1860 produced sixteen million salmon annually. Today the figure has dropped to less than one million respectively (Where the Salmon Rule). In 1990 not one sock-eye salmon out of a population of thousands made its way back to its spawning area in Redfish Lake, Idaho (In a Sea of Trouble). The brutal decline is emblematic of the problem. Biologists Willa Nehlen, Jack Williams, and James Litchatowich reported that of the hundreds of distinct native populations that were once common to the Pacific Coast are disappearing. Of the original stocks 106 are extinct, 102 definitely face extinction, fifty-eight are at moderate risk, and fifty-four are a matter of concern. All in all the report said that 214 natural spawning routes are in very serious trouble (Fish-eries Mar. /April issue). What possibly could be the reason for the sharp decline of this life giving species of fish? HUMANS. Let’s start with dams. The first half of the twentieth century, in order to harness the power of the rivers in the Pacific Northwest for producing electricity, and producing water for irrigation in the semi-arid valleys, countless dams were built. The engineers that built these structures had the salmon in mind during the design phase. They constructed fish ladders and artificial falls designed to allow the upstream passage for the salmon past all the concrete now blocking the rivers vital to the species. On the Columbia River alone eight major dams were built, while a spattering of additional smaller dams were plugging up the tributaries. There was something that the engineers did not account for and that is for each existing dam five to fourteen percent of adult salmon moving upstream cannot find the fish ladders, or if they do end up getting lost in the vast reservoirs created between dams. And worse yet the engineers designed the ladders and artificial falls for fish moving upstream, not the smolts making their way downstream to the Pacific Ocean. It is estimated that we lose ninety percent of the smolts that count on the flow of the river to carry them to the Ocean. Instead the juvenile fish get caught and mutilated in the screens or die due to predation in the reservoirs (Oregon Department of Fish and Wildlife). Another huge problem to the choked rivers is land degradation. Every year the U. S. Forest Service sanctions timber and grazing practices on the national forest lands in the regions that are ecologically prudent to native salmon populations. The clear cutting, roadways, and destruction harm the salmon that make it through the dams indefinitely. Salmon need cool clean water to survive the journey to their spawning grounds, and the logging industry cuts all the trees down, which in turn lets more radiation from the sun hit the water and heat it up. The trees being cut down speeds up the erosion of the soil, which pours into the streams making them very dirty which suffocates the eggs and alevins. Road and rail construction causes land-slides that block rivers (The Plundered Seas). A study conducted by the Forest Service looked at several hundreds of miles of streams in Oregon, Washington, and Idaho counting cool clean pools that are critical to wild salmon. They found that fifty to seventy-five percent of the pools were gone in the most heavily logged areas. Those areas that were spared still remained stable or even gained pools over the last fifty years. One of if not the largest problem is that of overfishing. Humans with their large boats and drift nets sometimes spanning thirty miles in length, gill nets and fish wheels can catch salmon by the millions. Alaska alone harvests 200 million fish annually to keep up with the demand. The United States, which is limited by strict total allowable catch quotas (TAC’S) that monitor and limit the overall weight of fish which fishermen may land, based on advice by scientists, and is enforced by the U. S. Fish and game Service. Although sometimes the TAC is wrong, and the U. S. takes to many fish we are not the main problem here. It is the other countries that illegally set their nets in our waters to poach salmon by the millions. Specifically the Taiwanese fishing fleets whose thousands of miles of netting plucked at least by estimate of the NMFS eight million illegal salmon last year (NMFS). Also the NMFS estimates that at least twenty million West Coast salmon are caught illegally every year. As it stands now according to 1996 study Factors Contributing to the Decline of Chinook Salmon estimates that in recent years harvest impacts on Puget Sound Chinook salmon stocks have been quite high on average sixty-eight to eighty-three percent of the wild stock has been taken by fishing. And that is a problem when you consider the other factors that man has created that impede or harm native stocks. Pollution from pulp mills, industry and agriculture has also had a devastating effect salmon. Aluminum pollution has had a particularly horrible effect on the gills of the salmon. The aluminum mutates the thin mucous membrane from which the fish takes its oxygen and keeping out potentially damaging microbes into a crusty damaged organ that inhibits the fish’s ability to transition from fresh to salt water (Nature’s Crusaders). Also it has been found that mixtures of organophosphate and carbamate pesticides that are commonly detected in freshwater streams and reservoirs that support endangered species of salmon. What happens is the pesticides can inhibit the activity of acetyl cholinesterase which is a hormone secreted to aid in neural function (The Synergistic Toxicity of Pesticide Mixtures). Several of these chemicals when mixed together in relatively low doses have proven to be fatal for the salmon, whereas individually the chemicals in the same doses are non-lethal. In the late nineteenth century man noticed that there were less salmon in the waters of the Pacific Northwest and something had to be done to supplement the commercial fishermen’s catch. Thus came the idea of hatcheries. Hatcheries work like this: Salmon that are returning to spawn in their home rivers are captured. These captured fish contain both males and females. The eggs are taken from the females, and the sperm is taken from the males and mixed together to form fertilized eggs. The eggs are then incubated, where the hatched fish are placed in holding tanks to grow and develop. When adequate growth is reached the fish are released into the river where they make their way to the ocean, mature and return back to the hatchery or spawning grounds. This practice makes the survival rates increase because there are no predators in hatcheries and their environment stays constant plus food is abundant. So what is the problem with hatcheries you might ask? The answer is genetic diversity. The fish that come to the hatcheries (which are set up along rivers) get a lot of the same fish back every year. Currently, most of the fish in the hatcheries are fourth, fifth, and sixth generation stocks from the hatchery. These fish keep being bred with genetically similar fish, which weakens the population as a whole. On the Columbia River in 2006 8,157 oho salmon were caught for a study to determine how many were hatchery fish, and the results were shocking. Of those fish 6,234 were hatchery fish leaving only around 1900 as wild stock (The End of the Line). Without genetic diversity the salmons’ immune systems get weakened and they become more susceptible to diseases that normally wouldn’t affect them. Also a concern for hatcheri es is that they grow larger than their wild counterparts and evidence suggests that the larger hatchery fish kill wild stock due to predation (Northwest fisheries Science Center). Hatcheries are also known to have disease outbreaks that can be transmitted to wild stock. Now that I have shown that there is a problem let’s take a look at what lower numbers of salmon effect in their environment. When Salmon make their epic runs up the rivers of the Pacific Northwest not all survive. Bears numbering in the hundreds stand in the rivers plucking fish out of the water trying to put on pounds and pounds of fat to get them and their cubs through the long northern winters, and the salmon are the bears’ main source of calories (Planet Earth). When the salmon runs are abundant the bears only eat the skin, brain, and eggs of the fish because they are the parts with the highest calorie content. So along the shores of the rivers lie thousands maybe even hundreds of thousands of carcasses that are free for the taking by wolves, coyotes, fox, raptors, insects and any other opportunistic animals. These remains are vital to the overall health of many different species of land animals, not to mention plants as well. Even after the animal kingdom has had their way with the carcasses there is still rotting flesh and bone that gets left behind. A study of fifty different watersheds in the Great Bear Rainforest on British Columbia’s central coast says that the predation of salmon provides a â€Å"potent nutrient subsidy† that drives plant growth in the surrounding forest. Numbers nearing fifty percent of the salmon are getting carried to the forest, with the remaining fish that make it to the spawning grounds to reproduce and die ending up decomposing on the banks. The study observed everything from lichens to shrubs and found that nitrogen loving plants were thriving in these areas (The Vancouver Sun Mar. 25, 2011). The areas that did not have the salmon were not as robust. When the salmon decompose carbon and nitrogen get released into the soil. That coupled with animal scat makes for very rich fertilizer making the forest grow thick and lush (Hanley and Schnell 1998). When dealing with an issue of this scope one must take into consideration the many obstacles that will present themselves, such as how to regulate the many countries that have access to the Pacific Ocean. How will funding be provided for the operation? How to peacefully find an alternative for those who depend on salmon for their family’s livelihood. Continuing research for hatcheries and the money that will be needed and so on and so forth. My plan to preserve the pacific salmon is multi-tiered and complex, but if the people involved can be agreeable a sacred and valuable species can be saved. First the issue of regulating all the coastal countries for poachers must be addressed. I propose that these countries involved start a salmon fishing enforcement bureau that is a combined and comprehensive unit tasked to regulate, seek out, and enforce the laws and regulations with steep penalties decided by a committee comprised of representatives from each respective country. Secondly I propose that all commercial fishing be halted until the populations of salmon can recover. Once recovered then commercial fishing can be continued at a reasonable rate as advised by the bureau’s biologists. Doing this would outrage the fishermen who depend on salmon for their income, but there is a solution to this as well. The misplaced fishermen will have the option to be trained free of cost, (made possible by government funding) and assigned jobs at salmon farms and hatcheries, also the processing plants that butcher and package the salmon. While the fishing ban is in effect the nation will rely on fish farms to provide salmon for consumption by humans. Except those indigenous peoples (such as the Indian Tribes and Inuit) that will be given rights to a predetermined number of fish for their freezers to be consumed. To address the problem that the hatcheries and farms produce regarding disease and inbreeding the government will redirect money in the national budget to enlist the help of the foremost experts in the field to figure out ow to eliminate disease and genetically diversify the stocks coming from the farms and hatcheries. Next the U. S. Army Corps of Engineers will demolish dams at strategic locations to allow the salmon free passage up their streams and rivers. To supplement the cheap electricity that will be lost, wind and solar farms will be set up to get electric to customers that the dams supplied electric to. Also we will utilize available technology to modify the dams in a way that all migrating fish will know where to go, and receive safe passage through the structure. Logging companies will be mandated to not build roads or clear cut trees any closer than 1 mile from a salmon spawning river or tributary unless it is deemed necessary by the U. S. Division of Parks and Recreation. Enlisting the help of the EPA would be a priority. The EPA could ban the use of certain pesticides that contain aluminum in their chemical makeup, and test farmers land to regulate and arrest (if necessary) those in violation. In closing I would like to state that the future of the Pacific salmon is clouded by all of the problems I listed in the above paragraphs. And it was we who have created this problem, so it has to be we who fix it. Implementing the plan I have devised will be challenging, tough and expensive, but if the American people can be patient and understanding I know we can come together as a country and fix our mistake and save the salmon. We have to. Salmon are more than fish; they are one of the last great symbols of the west, and givers of life to so many people, plants, and animals. To lose them due to non-natural causes (like we did the bison) would be a travesty. The world would quite literally be a lot less beautiful without them, and I cannot imagine it. Can you?

Macro Environment of Nestle

Macro Environment of Nestle Nestlà © is the worlds largest food company and has held offices in the UK as early as the 1860s. Nestlà © was originally made up of three major companies: Nestlà ©, the Anglo- Swiss Condensed Milk Company and Rowntrees of York. In 1905 Nestlà © merged with the Anglo-Swiss Condensed Milk Company and quickly became known for infant formula, chocolates and tinned milks. In 1939 Nestlà © launched Nescafà © in the UK, which became an immediate success for instant coffee (Nestlà © UK, 2012). In 1988 Nestlà © obtained Rowntrees of York and has since invested over  £200 million into the York site and  £100 million in their Tutbury factory. Between the years of 2006 2011, Nestlà © invested  £224 million in their UK sites (Nestlà © UK, 2012). With 6,500 employees across 20 different locations in the UK and exporting as much as  £300 million worth of products each year to 50 different countries, Nestlà © is not only a major employer in the UK, but also one of the UKs food industrys major exporters (Nestlà © UK, 2012). In 2002, Nestlà © UK acquired Ski Yoghurt from Nestlà © Australia and six years later in 2008, Ski Yoghurt was re-launched with only natural ingredients combining real fruit with thick, creamy tasting yoghurt and no artificial colours, flavours or preservatives (Nestlà © AU, 2012). 1.2 Previous Positioning of Ski Ski yogurt is currently positioned as a naturally delicious product and its positioning strategy focuses mainly on its fruit heritage and its value to the consumer. After the last re-launch of 2008, the new re-designed packaging tries to connect ski back to nature and puts forward an all natural ingredients story by featuring plenty of fruits in their natural environment for every flavour (Appendices 9.1). 2. Situational Analysis 2.1 Macro environmental analysis In the analysing of the macro environment of the product category, PEEST analysis is used to identifiy five main forces which affect marketing decision-making. The five forces analysed are political-legal factors, ecological-physical factors, economic factors, social-cultural factors and technological factors. (P)olitical Legal factors: EFSA bro-biotic dossiers companies that have vested interest in functional health adopt a more cautious approach or focus on benefits that have secured EFSA approval (Mintel, 2012). Trade negotiations under WTO. Bilateral trade deals (Doha, 2011). Compliance with legislation is becoming more costly April 2012 Dairy UK intention to sign up to the Department of Healths calorie reduction pledge which aims to support and enable consumers to eat and drink fewer calories on daily bases. (E)cological Physical factors: Environmentally friendly, reduced packaging is being promoted by the government (recycling good for corporate social responsibility image) Climate change adaptations Water management is an emerging priority (E)conomic factors: Unemployment rates on the rise, reaching 8.4% during January 2012 (Trading Economics, 2012) Economic growth of the market UK yoghurt market grows in a slow but steady pace over the last year at a rate of approximately 2.5% (Mintel, 2012) (S)ocial Cultural factors: Good intentions, such as not snacking between meals and eating more fiber, have become less of a priority in the recent years. Preoccupation with trying to loose weight Adults within a family are expected to remain the largest population segment Strong growth expected in the number of children between 5 and 9 years old Projected increase of one-person households (contribute less to volume sales of yoghurt). (T)echnological factors: The use of the internet through online grocery retailing directly influenced the supply chain, operations and processes of grocery and food retailers Online retail shopping has gained considerable popularity due to the increased accessed to broadband internet in the UK; 70% of overall market are broadband users (Keynote, 2010) Lack of applied RD and knowledge exchange as Government reduces funding 2.2 Micro Environmental Analysis In order to analyse the companys both internal and external environment, the SWOT analysis is used to identify the strengths and weaknesses of the organisation as well as the opportunities and threats from within its market environment. SWOT Analysis: Strengths Ski is apart of a global established brand Nestlà © Nestlà © stands for product Innovation Strong promotional activities e.g. Exclusive gifts as a part of their promotional offers Product availability and distribution to all major stores Perceived as a quality brand Strong historical background One of the first in the yogurt market Strong ability to recover from market share loss in the short term (2008) Weaknesses Frequent re-launches over the years lacks consistency Weak TV advertisements Very weak presence on social media platforms less interactive and informational, lacking updates Current positioning is not consistent with the current image of Ski, therefore its losing its roots Frequent re-launches over the years lacks consistency Opportunities Over three quarters of yogurt users view Ski as a healthy alternative to other treats (Mintel, 2012) Use of social media is growing extremely fast Backing of Nestle known as a established brand Spoonable yogurt represents over four fifths of the yogurt market (87%) (Mintel, 2012) Consumer engagement Capitalize on organic/historic brand positioning Increase of online advertising Increase of use of internet Increase of nutritional awareness Threats Decrease in popularity Higher competition from competitors Competitors stealing market share Due to the Economic downturn consumers switch to store-brands (Mintel, 2012) Customers choosing healthier or non dairy yoghurt options Brand loyalty Customers not making the switch from their usual brand to trying Ski Only gaining an older demographic because of history and recognition Nestle boycotts within the UK 2.3 Market Trends Overall since 2007, there has been a 0.9% increase in the eating of yoghurt, with an increase 7.1% in heavy users, and decreases of 1.9% and 5.2% in medium and light users respectively. The yoghurt market in the UK is saturated, making it hard to add new users. Yoghurt is considered a healthy option, with low fat varieties making up 56% of purchases. The growth of low-fat yoghurts, at 1.9%, has been faster than that of standard yoghurt, at 0.6%. Those in families are more likely to eat yoghurt compared with those not. The group that buys the most yoghurt is that of women and households with children aged 1-9. An increase in the number of 5-9 year olds of 11% is expected between 2012 and 2017, meaning the number of people in the above group will expand, giving potential for more growth. More affluent families are also more likely to be consumers of yoghurt, and are likely to consumer more of it (Mintel, 2012). 2.4 Competitors Within the dairy market in the UK, retailers own-label products have significally increased the competition since due to the economic downturns of the last several years, consumers tend to switch towards them. The two bigger players of the market are Danome and Muller which together capture 60% of the spoonable yogurt sales and continue to dominate the market. The direct competitors of the Ski yoghurt are Activia, Muller, Yoplait, Yeo Valley, Onken, Munch Bunch, Weight /watchers and own-label products (Appendices 9.2). 3. Objectives The roles of objectives play an important part of the overall campaign. Both the marketing and communications objectives provide direction, focus, values, and a time frame, while also providing a means by which the success of the campaign can be evaluated (Fill, 2009) 3.1 Marketing objectives Increase market share by 1% by June 2013. Increase volume of sales by 20% by June 2013 3.2 Communication Objectives Increase re-launch brand awareness by 30% by June 2013 Impart nutritional knowledge, brand heritage and Ski yoghurt diet plan to both males and females, ages 25-40 within the first 2 months of the re-launch. Build project the position of a healthy, active, and convenient product image of Ski to both males and females, 25-40 years old within the first 4 months of re-launch. Increase shelf space in supermarkets by 20% by June 2013 Expand saturation on trade grounds by 15% by June 2013 20,000 consumers to sample the product by the end of the campaign-June 2013 4.0 Consumer Strategy 4.1 Segmentation Demographic Trends According to Mintel (2011), The group that buys the most yoghurt is that of women and households with children aged 1-9. The current target market of Nestlà © is working mothers, aged bwtween 35-44 years old with older kids. However, an 11% increase in the number of children aged 5-9 year olds is expected between 2012 and 2017. (REPEAT and needs a Reference). This gives potential of growth and more affluent families being more likely to be yoghurt consumers, and are likely to consumer more of it (Mintel, 2011). In terms of social class, AB, C1 and C2, social class who are professionals, supervisory and skill manual workers, the geographic location of these classes is in United Kingdom. Hence, the yoghurt market should focus on British customers to gain an effective marketing strategy. Behavioural/Psychographic Trends The reason being that British customers are more concerned with their health. More and more, they consider calories consumed and fat content to ensure that they are eating well. Their healthy lifestyle can safeguard them from the widespread obesity epidemic (Key note, 2012). Some customers, who find themselves lack of time having proper food, consume snacks instead of main meals. Yogurt is the choice of healthy food of this target market, containing essential nutrition to make them healthier (Mintel, 2011) 4.2 Target Audience Ski Yogurt is marketing to group of people who prefer natural yogurt products in effective quality and sufficient quantities. This target audience covers; working mothers aged 25-50 with older children. Our target audience would be A, B, C1 and C2 (Appendices 9.3) which primarily concern with health and nutrition. We will expand our target audiences network with family who would like active activities and has busy lifestyle. 4.3 Pen Profile Within the Ski consumer strategy, young families, especially mothers who take a considerable interest in both their appearance and health will be targeted. In addition, young working people that like outdoor activities such as exercising, walking, and socializing. Also, someone who is of a higher social class, and will therefore typically think more about nutrition in trying maintain a more attractive physical appearance. A good approach to reach the target audiences is through advertising messages on television; press media and outdoor media that attract the consumers. Alternatively, a more efficient communication network is through social media such as Facebook and Twitter. Accordingly, marketing activity will adapt and respond to changes in customer behavior. 4.4 Positioning The aim of the campaign would be to maintain the current positioning of Ski as a healthy and natural product choice and focus on strengthening the healthy aspect of the product as well as introducing the convenience factor. The ultimate goal of the campaign would be to move Ski yogurt towards a healthier position among the competitors within the perception map (Appendices 9.4). 4.5 Creative strategy Strap line: How do YOU doSKI? From Skis previous re-launch in 2008, it has been positioned as a brand with high nutritional value using only natural ingredients, and no artificial colours, flavours or preservatives (Nestlà ©, 2012). The Ski UK brand is one that naturally composes historical and nutritional value while also being backed by Nestlà ©, one of the biggest food distributors in the UK. Starting in January of 2013, Ski UK will begin their re-launch by focusing on the promotion of new beginnings, and will accordingly play an important role in influencing consumers to aim for a healthier and happier lifestyle in the new-year. By enhancing their current traits, the re-launch and creative strategy of Ski will be positioned as an active brand with high nutritional value and convenience for those with a busy lifestyle. In order to support the re-branding of Ski, the colours will change from its current blue, white and red to a more unique and fresh white, black and green. The new colour of Ski will directly reflect the active and green-friendly image of the brand. Ski yoghurt will be seen as a product that will enhance your overall health, happiness and lifestyle. The logo will also change to differentiate Ski from its competitors and to reflect the new positioning of the overall Ski UK brand. Also, the Nestle logo, currently on the packaging will become smaller to give the consumer the feel of a more organic, and family-owned product (Appendices 9.5). It is shown that the attractiveness of packaging affects the volume of sales and packaging can be essential in affecting the positioning of a product (Fill, 2009). In order to attract the attention of Skis target market, the packaging of Ski will become more durable, sustainable and pleasing to the eye to reflect the new active and green image of the brand. The basis of the re-launch will be based around the new slogan: How do YOU doSKI? In the advertisements, the produced concept will introduce new ways of eating and using Ski yoghurt. People will be shown how they can DoSki. This will be shown through sports activities like football, young professionals with busy lifestyles and health-conscious families. The look and feel of a product will change while still holding on to its natural heritage and nutritional value. The overall goal within the Ski UK re-launch and creative strategy is to enhance the product. 5.0 Communication mix 5.1. Media Planning The media plan of the campaign will take place within a six month time period, which is broke down into 24 weeks for precision. The brand can take advantage of the spirit after the New Year by initiating an image of a new start, new beginning and changed behaviors. Thus, the repackaging, and the pre and post-testing of the new design will take place three weeks before New Year. Advertising among business clients will take place in the third week of the repackaging and in the first week of the communication campaign delivered by B2B print media. The developed company website and a new Facebook page will start at the same time but remain active throughout the whole period of the campaign. In order to attract the consumers attention, the first week of the media activities plan will start with TV advertisements. During January, February and the first week of March, the tools used will help create awareness among non-users and regular or inconsistent users. Apart from TV commercials, these tools include online and outdoor media. From week 10 (second week of March) to week 13, print, online, outdoor and TV media will be used to inform people about the competition-taking place in weeks 14 and 15 (middle of April), which is intended to provoke interest among customers. During the competition, online media will remain active as well as sampling, which would create desire among people. Sales promotion will start in the second week of the competition (week 15) and will be used again throughout the whole month of March. Meanwhile, online media will be used after the end of the competition to the end of the campaign in June to inform people about its results. In addition, print and outdoor media is implemented in the end of June in order to prompt customers about the competition and its beneficial outcomes. Successfully, at the end of the campaign a complete AIDA model would be applied. Appendix 9.6 shows a detailed media plan including time frame and Appendix 9.7 shows the budget of the campaign. 5.2.1 Advertising Most marketing communications campaigns rely on advertising as it is an important communication mix tool and is best used for awareness as it is has the potential to reach a large number of target audiences with simple and understandable message content. Hence Ski has given emphasizes to their advertising campaigns with their amounting to  £72,6277; the highest amongst other communication mixes. This includes the production cost of advertisements in the communication mix. Advertising would give Ski an excellent platform to control the message, content, show-case creativity, and give it a competitive advantage to their competition. This would enable the increase of brand / product awareness, associations and encourage the change in consumer perceptions including their involvement with the advertisement. Their prime communication objective is awareness. The emphasis on the strategy for Ski is to introduce better understanding of the yoghurts features. Broadcast Television This broadcast medium has a huge influence over mass coverage and it makes a good platform for skis target segment. Skis budget allocated to the TV commercials would cost  £420,121. The commercials would air during the time slots, 11.00 to 21.30 between weeks 1 to week 13. The chosen channels would be ITV 1(This morning, Early evening news and Movie / drama) and ITV 2 (all-day campaign). Through this time slot allocation, Ski would be able to target mothers during the morning slots and during news and drama slots the message can be sent to families with younger children. ITV would air the commercials to increase awareness of the product between weeks 1 to week 5 at various time slots. In week 12 and 13, the media would air commercials promoting an upcoming sports event for schools. Print media Ski will use print media as a part of their awareness strategy as it has a huge impact on mass audience because of its easy access and availability to mass audiences. The target audience of The Sun would be parents, both working parents and stay-home mothers. The Sun is one of the leading daily newspapers in the UK with a readership of more than 2 million per day (Insight, 2011a). The advertisement in The Sun will appear in 6 issues in week 10 and 11 and the results of the event will feature in 2 issues during the last 2 weeks of the campaign. The Grocer will focus on business to business advertisements to attract the interests of potential clients to promote Skis products in the stores. These advertisements would feature in the magazine during the pre-launch weeks and the first week of the campaign. Additionally, before the Ski holiday competition, retailers will be targeted again through the magazine in order to raise interest in supporting the event and giving it a space in their stores. The approximate cost of advertising in print media would cost Ski  £14,616. Digital media (online) This new form of communication is high in frequency and offers a direct route of advertising to a wider audience; it is faster, easily accessible, flexible and can get instant responses, hence Ski will focus on improving on their web/social media presence. Through websites such as Yahoo!, the advertisements will be start from week 3 to week 17 and on the Good Food (targeting online shoppers who spend time with families and enjoy nutritious food) from week 10 to week 20 (BRAD Insight, 2011d). An online group page for Ski would be created on Facebook as well as advertisements on the site. The group page would focus on the upcoming sporting event and follow all the stages of the event, as well as interacting with existing ski consumers, sharing recipes, comments and feedback. The Facebook adverts will run from week 2 to week 22 and the online group page would commence in week 3 of the pre-launch period until the end of the campaign. The approximate cost of online advertising is  £ 30, 700. ( appendix ). Yahoo! reaches 22 million people in the UK per month; it offers corporate partnerships and provides a unique search and display engine. There are a high number of users using this search engine and it is likely that our target market will come across our adverts, hence the decision to choose Yahoo! for advertising. (BRAD Insight, 2011c). Ski will give importance on building their new interactive website. This would cost  £ 10,600 including half yearly maintenance. The website will include 10 pages and those will include recipes, news / events about ski, a feedback page, image gallery, links to social networking sites, promotional offers and tracking of the entire football event and family Ski holiday competition. Outdoor media In terms of Skis marketing strategy, this form of of media will be a support tool to other mediums such as broadcast and print. It is an effective technique of grabbing the attention of a large audience. Ski will use the 3 main formats of out-door media in order to achieve this. Billboards: To be placed at various central locations. Amounting to  £68,640 in cost. Bus Stops: Posters will be placed in bus stops. Amounting to  £36,000 in cost. Transit: Ads will be placed on buses. Amounting to  £67,600 in cost. The out-door media will run for a period of 8 weeks (from week 5 to week 12). The first 5 weeks will focus on brand and product awareness while the remaining 3 weeks will include details about the sporting event competition. The event result adverts will commence from week 22 to the end of the marketing campaign. Cinema The cinema adverts will run between week 7 and week 10. The cost for 100 screens at 12 cinemas would be  £ 40,000. The advertisements will be mostly run during the screening of movies for children especially when families spend time together. This will focus on the awareness of the football event and the family Ski holiday competition. Packaging Skis new design and packaging (industrial designer charges) will cost approximately  £15,000. The new packaging and design will be completed during the pre launch week before the media plan is implemented. 5.2.2 Sponsorship Sponsorship will be an integral part of Skis marketing communications mix. Through sponsorships new business opportunities emerge such as media coverage, increase of goodwill, increased consumer base and interaction between Ski and the consumer. Skis sponsorship cost is  £6,10,000. Ski will organize a sporting event for schools across England, where in the schools will participate in a football tournament. The winner of the competition will receive sporting equipment sponsored by Ski. The main aim behind holding this event is to promote the health and fitness lifestyle that Ski and Nestlà © stand for. 5.3 Sales promotion Through sales promotions Ski seeks to influence consumer behavior with their interactive promotional strategies. These strategies are especially designed to facilitate consumer interest, interaction and to promote fitness and nutrition. The total cost of Skis sales promotion would amount to approximately  £ 131,055. Vouchers Part of the promotions would include vouchers in Good Housekeeping magazine. The circulation of the magazine is over 400,000 per month (BRAD Insight, 2012). This is a monthly lifestyle issue focused on home and family; hence the rate of vouchers being received by potential consumers is relatively higher since the target market for this is also for mothers. During the sports event, vouchers would be distributed to students and their families to encourage the sales of the product. The vouchers would offer a 20p reduction on the price of any Ski Yoghurt. The total cost of these vouchers would amount to  £ 99,255. Good Housekeeping magazine voucher cost and magazine space amounts to  £ 99,105, whereas school promotional vouchers amount to  £ 150. Sampling Skis sales promotions will include sampling during the school competitions and in supermarkets. The overall cost of the sales promotional activities amounts to  £ 31,800. The sampling event will introduce consumers to a new package design and will focus on building awareness of the yoghurt. 5.4 Public relations A variety of promotional activities will be conducted during the sampling phase in supermarkets and during the sporting event. The main activity would include a life -size cutout with an image of a person skiing and holding a pot of Ski yoghurt and it will be displayed in both school competition finals and supermarkets. A professional photographer will take pictures of people. People need to be creative and imaginative and they can show different ways of using the yoghurt for a snack. Images with captions will then be uploaded on Facebook. Three families of four with the most Likes on their images will win a Ski trip to the French Alps. The Ski holiday will cost approximate  £2,000 each (Adapted from Thompsons, 2012). Twitter will be kept up-to date during the entire campaign. The school football competition videos will be uploaded to You Tube after the event. Post the ski holiday, Videos / images of the families that won the holidays to the Alps will be uploaded to YouTube / Faceb ook. The total cost of a Web administrator will cost  £16,000 per year, which would include maintaining and updating social media accounts like Facebook, Twitter, YouTube (Adapted from PayScale, 2012c). 5.5 Budgeting The media used in the new campaign for Ski includes television, print media, online and outdoor advertising, and improvement of Skis website. Also, sport competition among primary schools, ski holiday competition, sampling during the finals of the competitions and in supermarkets, sales promotion in the form of coupons and repackaging are part of the marketing activities. Furthermore, the costs of pre-testing are calculated on the basis that Ski will need 1 focus group for the testing of the packaging; one focus group testing perceptions; and one focus group testing advertisements. The pre-testing of the awareness will be held by ambassadors in front of 50 central stores in London and Cardiff. The post-testing of the awareness will be the same in the end of the campaign and the post-testing of the perceptions will require one focus group. Additionally, the production cost of the advertisements is estimated as  £30,000 as 5% of the total advertising tools used. The budget of the campaign is estimated at about 5% of the intended market objective to increase sales to  £32 million in six months. During that time the budget should not exceed  £1.6 million. The total amount of the assessed costs is  £  £1,565,467 inclusive of  £50,000 for unexpected costs, especially having in mind that a competition among children can bring many unplanned activities involving extra costs. (Appendices 9.7). 6.0 Evaluation 6.1 Pre-testing To assess how well the new campaign will be received, tests will be carried out upon the prospective advertisements, guiding developers towards advertisements that are conducive to fulfilling the objectives. Five focus groups will used as they can accurately determine the reception of the advert, and therefore inform the creative process. To avoid bias brought in by participants interpretation of their own views, projective techniques will be used. Specifically completion will be used; where partially formed sentences are given to participants, helping to reduce bias and to structure responses in a way that gives responses that are easy to analysed. These should be carried out for all advertisement media developed for the campaign. 6.2 Post-testing Examination of the sales figures before and after the campaign will indicate whether the marketing objectives have been achieved. An examination of data showing any fluctuations in shelf space will of course show whether the desired increase in space has been achieved. Similarly, if all samples of the yoghurt are given out, the target number of people trying a sample will be met with room to spare. Awareness will be measured before and after the campaign to show whether the increase in awareness sought has been achieved. Measurement of this will be carried out with surveys. They will be carried out using opportunity samples outside supermarkets in two city centres within the UK. The locations of central London and Cardiff city centre have been selected as they are within the areas of highest and lowest consumption of yoghurt respectively, giving a more representative sample (Mintel, 2012). Focus groups will be used, separately to those used in pretesting, to show changes brought about in the perceptions of ski. Two groups will be run before the campaign, and two after. Monitoring the campaign and Public Relations Activities Considering the commencement of Skis social media presence in the UK, analysis of feedback from consumers and press will be carried out continuously during the campaign. Thus making it possible to refine and adapt. Using a number of different evaluation methodologies is key giving a holistic insight into the effect the campaign generally (Fill, 2009); and a variety is utilised here, giving a rounded picture whilst showing how the objectives were fulfilled.

Hunger Essay -- World Hunger Poverty Food Essays

Hunger Hunger is an issue which many people think lies little importance. Im going to give you a look at World Hunger as a Picture of Poverty, how it affects Third World Nations, and How World Hunger is a disease that is plaguing our society. "Food is more than a trade commodity," pleaded Sir John Boydorr in 1946. "It is an essential to life." The first director-general of the new Food and Agriculture Organization of the United Nations, Boydorr fruitlessly proposed plans for a World Food Board to protect nations and people from hunger in the world market system. That market system does not distribute food on the basis of nutritional need. This is one of the most troubling and complex realities of the world hunger problem. During recent famines in Ethiopia, in another example of the workings of the marketplace, foreign food aid begins trucked to famine areas from ships at the docks passed food leaving the famine areas on other vehicles. Merchants were taking food from famine areas to parts of the country where there was no famine. World Hunger and poverty can be seen in many ways. But first lets establish a solid definition of poverty : Poverty is a state in which the ability of individuals or groups to use power to bring about good for themselves, their families, and their community is weakened or blocked. When someone lacks food, this is referred to as material poverty. This sort of poverty can hurt people in many ways, it can hurts people's self esteem and it can also hurt their outlook on life. Lets say you come home from work to see your family, instead of seeing a family which is happy because it has a roof over its head you come home to see that your children don't have enough food on the table to keep them properly nourished. This hurts familys and tears some of them apart. It is also just a very cruel punishment because after a while of being hungry, you start to starve to death and when you starve, the body just starts to eat itself up to find the nourishment it needs. It can also effect people's outlook on life and on people in a major way. People who are denied food can start to hate life and everyone around them. There's also two instincts in life that will always kick in when your hungr y: The survival instinct which is to survive no matter what the situation is and the instinct to provide food for your family. I am not a father myself, ... ...itary force and start trying to live like Jesus would want us to and help our fellow brothers in Christ. Due to many self-centered greedy people, we have fellow humans starving to death. This can't keep going on because every time someone starves, we are not just hurting that person but we are also hurting ourselves. We all live in the world as one race with different sections. The sections being the different nationalities we have in the world. And whenever one division gets hurt, the whole gets weakened. We need to depend on each other to survive from day to day healthy. It is true the poverty is a main cause of world hunger but it isn't the only cause. If the economy was serving the people and not the other way around then more people would have the money needed to buy food to live from day to day. And if greedy governments gave some of he people money or food they would have money to buy food. If the Military stopped using so much money to make machines that kill, there would be more money for people to buy food with. And if more people cared there would be a lot less starving peopl e in this world. If this hunger doesn't end, I can see a very pathetic world in our future. Hunger Essay -- World Hunger Poverty Food Essays Hunger Hunger is an issue which many people think lies little importance. Im going to give you a look at World Hunger as a Picture of Poverty, how it affects Third World Nations, and How World Hunger is a disease that is plaguing our society. "Food is more than a trade commodity," pleaded Sir John Boydorr in 1946. "It is an essential to life." The first director-general of the new Food and Agriculture Organization of the United Nations, Boydorr fruitlessly proposed plans for a World Food Board to protect nations and people from hunger in the world market system. That market system does not distribute food on the basis of nutritional need. This is one of the most troubling and complex realities of the world hunger problem. During recent famines in Ethiopia, in another example of the workings of the marketplace, foreign food aid begins trucked to famine areas from ships at the docks passed food leaving the famine areas on other vehicles. Merchants were taking food from famine areas to parts of the country where there was no famine. World Hunger and poverty can be seen in many ways. But first lets establish a solid definition of poverty : Poverty is a state in which the ability of individuals or groups to use power to bring about good for themselves, their families, and their community is weakened or blocked. When someone lacks food, this is referred to as material poverty. This sort of poverty can hurt people in many ways, it can hurts people's self esteem and it can also hurt their outlook on life. Lets say you come home from work to see your family, instead of seeing a family which is happy because it has a roof over its head you come home to see that your children don't have enough food on the table to keep them properly nourished. This hurts familys and tears some of them apart. It is also just a very cruel punishment because after a while of being hungry, you start to starve to death and when you starve, the body just starts to eat itself up to find the nourishment it needs. It can also effect people's outlook on life and on people in a major way. People who are denied food can start to hate life and everyone around them. There's also two instincts in life that will always kick in when your hungr y: The survival instinct which is to survive no matter what the situation is and the instinct to provide food for your family. I am not a father myself, ... ...itary force and start trying to live like Jesus would want us to and help our fellow brothers in Christ. Due to many self-centered greedy people, we have fellow humans starving to death. This can't keep going on because every time someone starves, we are not just hurting that person but we are also hurting ourselves. We all live in the world as one race with different sections. The sections being the different nationalities we have in the world. And whenever one division gets hurt, the whole gets weakened. We need to depend on each other to survive from day to day healthy. It is true the poverty is a main cause of world hunger but it isn't the only cause. If the economy was serving the people and not the other way around then more people would have the money needed to buy food to live from day to day. And if greedy governments gave some of he people money or food they would have money to buy food. If the Military stopped using so much money to make machines that kill, there would be more money for people to buy food with. And if more people cared there would be a lot less starving peopl e in this world. If this hunger doesn't end, I can see a very pathetic world in our future.

The Twilight Saga 5: Midnight Sun Chapter 15

As I swiftly proceed through the forest I noticed that the sky was still cloudy enough that I wouldn't catch the attention of any unsuspecting humans until mid-afternoon. I was slightly apprehensive about today's events. My family had become more encouraging of my decisions surrounding Bella, but the outcome of her fate was still questionable. Alice had assured me one more time before I left home that Bella would be fine, and that she would still be close, â€Å"just in case.† I knew what I willed her fate to be, but the many outcomes all appeared to be impractical to me. Take her life? Not hardly! Turn her into a vampire so I could keep her? Take her soul? So selfish – or I could leave her human and watch as she out grows me – I sighed. The trees around me were becoming less dense and I was suddenly outside Bella's house. I advanced to her door, something I had never done before. I had constantly been scaling the walls and climbing in and out through the window when entering this house. It was relatively quiet. It was divulged of any thoughts. I heard buoyant footsteps coming down the stairs. I nimbly knocked on her front door, immediately tense. I listened to her fumble around with the dead bolt, but a second later she flung the door wide open, sending a wave of her heady scent towards me. I wasn't expecting it so suddenly. I had to move the dry ache of my thirst to the back of my mind, today is about Bella, I reminded myself. I finally gazed at her and noticed that she was wearing a white shirt with a tan sweater and blue jeans. I started laughing because I was wearing something similar. â€Å"Good morning,† I chuckled. â€Å"What's wrong?† she glanced down at her clothes with panic in her voice. â€Å"We match.† I laughed again. I saw her eyes travel from my collar down to my jeans and she joined in with my laughter. She marched out of the house then, and shut the door behind her, locking it. I turned to walk to her truck, remembering I conceded in our dispute of who would drive today. A cool breeze blew her aroma in my direction and I was instantly grateful that the majority of the day would be spent in the great outdoors, where her scent was not nearly as potent. I turned and looked at her as she walked towards the truck. She had a smug look on her face. â€Å"We made a deal,† she reminded me haughtily as she wrenched herself up into the driver's side seat. I grimaced. â€Å"Where to?† she asked. â€Å"Put your seat belt on ?C I'm nervous already.† I commanded, even though I was mostly teasing. There is no accident I couldn't protect her from. She gave me a menacing look and reached over her shoulder and pulled the seat belt across her lap and buckled herself in. She sighed, â€Å"Where to?† she repeated. â€Å"Take the one-oh-one north.† I instructed. The heat coming from the vents in the truck sent her rich scent flooding into my lungs. The constant dull pain that her scent caused me was suddenly fierce. I stared at her face while she drove, a reminder that the most exquisite soul was next to me and that I needed to immediately cage the monster. I began planning the day in my head. If I knew what was to be expected, I would be less likely to make a mistake. That's right, no mistakes today! The problem with my planning was that I wasn't sure if we were going to make it to the meadow before the day ended because of how slow her truck was. â€Å"Were you planning to make it out of Forks before night fall?† I teased, hoping it would encourage a faster pace. â€Å"This truck is old enough to be your car's grandfather ?C have some respect.† She retorted. I continued to look fixedly at her. The anticipation of being all alone with Bella in the most peaceful meadow was causing a different type of monster to rear its head up now; infatuation maybe? It was electricity that was flowing through me now, preparing to be freed at a moment's touch. We were about to approach our next turn, â€Å"Turn right on the one-ten,† I instructed. She complied silently. â€Å"Now we drive until the pavement ends.† I smiled, thinking about how close we were to being by ourselves. Some would consider our time now to mean ‘alone', but my mind was abundantly full of the never ending humming and buzzing of thoughts. The meadow, my little slice of heaven, was one of the few places where I was able to give my mind some peace. Bella's face turned curious, â€Å"and what's there, at the pavements end?† she asked. â€Å"A trail.† â€Å"We're hiking?† she asked with panic in her tone. â€Å"Is that a problem?† â€Å"No,† she lied. â€Å"Don't worry, it is only five miles or so, and we're in no hurry.† Hoping my words would calm her. I could understand her panic though; she couldn't walk across a room without tripping, falling, or running into something. The woods must seem like a mine field to her. She had nothing to worry about though, if she were to trip, I would gladly save her from hitting the ground. It would be so easy to place my hand lightly, gently, under her elbow as I helped her through the slippery forest floor. My new desire was pulsing through my skin, sending more electricity through my finger tips. This new – desire – was now adding to the constant pressure in my chest. I fixed my eyes on her face, trying to comprehend the apparent terror in her eyes. Her expression altered numerous times, and instead of internally imploring my mind to finally perceive her thoughts, I decided I would simply make a request. â€Å"What are you thinking?† I beseeched. â€Å"Just wondering where we're going.† She replied smoothly; she was hiding her fright. I wanted to ease her mind a bit, so I provided a hint, â€Å"It's a place I like to go when the weather is nice.† I glanced out the window and she followed my gaze. The sky was still cloudy enough that my skin wasn't emitting rainbows. â€Å"Charlie said it would be warm today,† she mused. Ah, Charlie. I remembered that she refused to tell him about our outing. Had she changed her mind about that? â€Å"And did you tell Charlie what you were up to?† I asked. â€Å"Nope,† she said complacently. Of course not. But, she did tell Jessica about us, and the trip ?C hadn't she? â€Å"But Jessica thinks we're going to Seattle together?† I asked. If she told Jessica, then I would have to bring her back, for her family and mine. â€Å"No, I told her you canceled on me ?C which is true,† she reminded me. I was suddenly angry. Didn't she want me to bring her back? She would be willing to follow a killer into the woods, alone, and not tell a single soul. I growled internally. Who would know it was me who didn't bring her back home? I didn't want to bring her back and she was eager to tempt me to do just that. The monster began clawing at my chest bones again and I was dangerously irate that she put me in this situation. Hadn't I suffered enough? I pulled myself together, for the most part, before I responded. â€Å"No one knows you're with me?† I growled. She looked smug, â€Å"That depends†¦ I assume you told Alice?† she pondered. She thought that Alice knowing would make me want to bring her back? â€Å"That's very helpful, Bella,† I snapped, but at the sound of her name exiting my lips the electricity flared up and that new creature sent a lump to my throat. This†¦ desire; a longing; ripped through my body. I glared at her then and she was looking out the windshield like the conversation never took place, so nonchalant. Anger suddenly flared again. â€Å"Are you so depressed by Forks that it's made you suicidal?† I hissed. â€Å"You said it might cause trouble for you†¦ us being together publicly,† she reminded me. Unbelievable! She was worried about my safety, â€Å"So you're worried about the trouble it might cause me ?C if you don't come home?† my voice rose on the last word. She never looked away from the road, but nodded her head. She didn't look at all troubled about this! Unbelievable, I muttered so low she couldn't understand me. What could she possibly be thinking? Maybe she was sent here from my own personal hell to destroy me! Great – first her scent, then her ever growing presence in my life, and her unspoken thoughts; now she was essentially handing herself over to me on a silver platter. If I hadn't been continuously worried about my family she would have been dead when I first inhaled her heady scent. Now it was this precious soul in the car that I didn't want to destroy, and she was making it inconceivably hard not to. She was driving me to her demise. Insane. It was the only word to describe her actions. Maybe masochistic? Bella never took her eyes off the road. She must know that I was infuriated. The road did, though, inevitably end. There was a trail marked by a wooden sign; we would be going the opposite direction. She pulled the truck over, put it in park, and hoped out without one glance in my direction. I was immediately anxious that she didn't want to spend the rest of the day with me. Did I hurt her feelings? If she left me now ?C would I let her? Would she forgive me? I pulled my sweater off and placed it in the truck. It was unnecessary for me to wear something that was supposed to bring warmth when I was a cold creature. I was secretly hoping that the sun would warm my skin when it eventually appears through the clouds. I shut the door harder then I intended. I turned towards the forest and quietly reminded myself, no mistakes. â€Å"This way,† I called to her. I glanced over my shoulder to see her confused expression, â€Å"The trail?† she asked, terror in her voice. She had removed her sweater too, and it was tied securely around her waist. â€Å"I won't let you get lost,† I said with a mocking tone. She continued to stare at me without moving. Was she frightened now? I couldn't tell for sure ?C was she about to run away? Run Bella, run, I thought, then added, stay Bella, stay. She still didn't move, and I was again asking myself the ever prominent question, what is she thinking? I remembered that the best way to break her from her dejection was to guess what she was thinking. She would correct me if I were wrong, so I asked, â€Å"Do you want to go home?† Pain broke through my voice without my permission. â€Å"No,† she answered while walking towards me until she was close enough that I could feel the warmth of her body wash over me like a tidal wave. Her delectable scent made the monster inside me initiate it's slow clawing up my throat. I looked in her eyes, and there was still something distressing her. Fear maybe? â€Å"What's wrong?† I asked, apprehensive. â€Å"I'm not a good hiker,† she looked glum; â€Å"You'll have to be very patient.† This wasn't a challenge. â€Å"I can be patient ?C if I make a great effort.† I stared into her eyes and smiled, hoping she would realize that I wasn't lying. She didn't look convinced. Maybe she was finally coming to her senses. Was she afraid? Was it really fear I was sensing? Fear, I scoffed internally. â€Å"I'll take you home,† I assured her. Abruptly she responded, â€Å"If you want me to hack five miles through the jungle before sundown, you'd better start leading the way,† she hissed. So it wasn't fear that I saw, it was anger? Of course, I thought. I stood there frozen for a moment and frowned. I concealed a sigh and started towards the forest. I knew the forest well, and I chose a path that would be easiest for Bella. There were a few places where I had to move branches and hold down ferns to help her pass. When boulders and downed trees were in our path I hesitated only briefly. I didn't want to offer my hand, still worried that my ice cold skin would repulse her. I concentrated a great deal when I finally reached out to steady her by lifting her by her elbow. I knew if I were to hold any part of her body besides there, my desires would take over and I would bring my cold lips to her soft, warm ones. Each time I helped her, her heart would skip a beat, stutter, falter, and then rapidly pick up in double time. A few times I was worried that her heart had completely stopped. At one moment, I was helping her over a tree when the thought of kissing her sent a rush of desire through my body and I almost dropped her. She didn't notice. She was concentrating intently on not falling or tripping. After walking in silence for some distance, I decided to distract myself by asking her some more questions. She told me about some of her birthdays with her mother and stories about her grade school teachers. Each time she looked at me her breath sent a rush of longing and electricity through me. I thought of a few more questions, but the funniest answer I heard all day was when I asked her about family pets. â€Å"I have to admit, after killing three fish in a row, I'd given up on the whole institution,† she told me. I laughed so loudly that it echoed through the forest. I didn't mind being patient with Bella. Every moment spent with her was a blessing. The hours passed and I was holding back the monster inside me and my new found creature, desire. It was easier than I anticipated. How long I could keep them both caged was still a mystery. The sun was beginning to protrude through the tops of the trees. I was feeling a little uneasy about her seeing me in the sunlight. Would that be the moment she decides to leave my world? â€Å"Are we there yet?† Bella asked in mock-rage after several hours of hiking. â€Å"Nearly† I reassured her with a smile, â€Å"Do you see the brightness ahead?† I looked through the dense forest at the bright sunlight beaming through to the opening of a beautiful meadow. I watched her squint her eyes and look impatient. â€Å"Um, should I?† she asked incredulous. I smirked, â€Å"Maybe it's a bit soon for your eyes.† She looked at me then, â€Å"Time to visit the optometrist,† she grumbled. Like seeing the optometrist would improve her vision. My grin grew wider across my face. I noticed when she saw the light from the meadow. The sun was lighting the grassy floor and beautiful colors were reflecting from the different vegetation. I let her lead the way then, following behind her. I wanted her to enter the meadow first. Abruptly, a lump entered my throat at the thought of letting her see my crystal like skin reflecting in the sunlight. We reached the meadow then. I stopped in the shadows as I watched Bella walk easily into the sunlight. She gazed around with a look of wonder in her eyes. I could see her taking it all in, the flowers, the green grass, and the musical water in the background. She turned then, wondering where I had gone. I stood, once again, at the edge of the sunlight, like I had that time in Port Angeles. Then, I was fenced in by the dark shadows†¦ so limited, but this time I just needed to make that one simple step. Bella stepped towards me then, curiosity flaring in her eyes. I was reluctant to pass this invisible line. I belonged in the shadows, she belonged in the light. She smiled at me then and moved a step closer. She raised her hand in welcome. I wasn't ready, I put my hand up to stop her before she got to close, and she stopped hesitantly. It was too late, her warmth hit me suddenly and I took in a deep breath. Unthinking, I stepped closer to her, breaking the invisible fence between light and dark. Author's note: Thank you for the support on this story so far. I feel like with each chapter I become a better writer and if it wasn't for those of you who have been reading it and reviewing I probably would have never gotten this far! As I stepped into the sunlight my skin instantly absorbed the rays and emitted them back out in a band of colors. I could see my reflection in her deep chocolate eyes and in that moment I became a statue of uneasiness. What would this revelation do to her resolve? Her mouth slightly parted and I could smell her sweet breath on the light breeze. She only hesitated for a second, and then, with deliberate slowness, stepped closer to me, and I could instantly tell it wasn't because she had an aversion to me, but because she was anxious of what my reaction would be. I moved in that moment, a smile slowly spread across my face. She returned my smile immediately. Neither of us spoke for an immeasurable moment. I couldn't read her thoughts, but I could clearly read her eyes and her facial expressions. She was dazzled, and so was I. She slid down to the forest floor then, and sat with her arms around her knees. I mirrored her actions and lowered myself to the ground next to her. There were no foreign thoughts in my head at this moment and it was amazingly pleasant. I lay on the ground with my eyes closed. I felt the warm sun on my ice cold skin and hoped that it would warm up my skin so it wouldn't be abhorrent to the touch. As I laid there in silence, I was breathing in her fragrance. Mixed with the outside air and breeze, her scent was more appealing than it should be. As the silence around us grew, I began composing in my head and singing so quietly that I wasn't sure if Bella would be able to hear. She couldn't hear, because she asked after a minute what I was doing. As I lay there, enjoying the quietness of my mind and the divine essence of Bella, I felt something very lightly caress my hand. She was warm and I felt so many emotions at once, desire ?C fear ?C anxiety. My desire won my attention though, but the other emotions were still there in the back of my mind. I opened my eyes then, and my eyes met her face. She was the most exquisite creature I had ever seen. Her brown hair had glittering red tints in it when the sunlight hit it just right and her wide eyes were sparkling. She was staring fixedly at my hand, but moved her gaze to meet mine. She looked hesitant, like she was preparing for a scolding. I smiled then. â€Å"I don't scare you?† I tried to sound playful, though I was curious. â€Å"No more than usual,† she replied playfully. My smile grew, and I was nearly grinning from ear to ear. She returned my smile and then moved her stroking fingers up my forearm. I could see her hand quiver slightly as she moved her hand back and forth. I closed my eyes then. I didn't want to look away from her, but my thirst for her touch was growing. Desire was pulsing through my veins. In that moment I pictured grabbing her and holding her to my chest, caressing her back with my hands and pulling her ever closer. I imagined pulling her face into my hands and stroking her cheeks and hair. Desire pulsed through me in waves and I knew she could feel the electricity too. She was still tentative. â€Å"Do you mind?† she inquired. Didn't she know that she was sending large electric shocks of pleasure through my body? â€Å"No,† I replied, still keeping my eyes shut, afraid that if I were to look upon her, I would make my fantasies a reality, and I couldn't let that happen. â€Å"You can't imagine how that feels.† I sighed. She continued to trail her warm fingers across my arm, expanding her search up my arm. I felt the new creature, desire, break through my carefully cultivated fa?ade and divulged into more fantasies. I pictured bringing my lips to her neck, not to take her life, but to kiss lightly. I imagined moving my lips from her neck to her ear where I would whisper how much I loved her. She grabbed my hand lightly with her free hand and was trying to turn it over. My own nature took over and I flipped my hand, palm up, so fast that her fingers froze on my arm and I realized that I made a mistake. No mistakes, I reminded myself. â€Å"Sorry,† I whispered. I briefly caught a glimpse of her face, making sure I was forgiven. I saw that I was, and closed my eyes again then added, â€Å"It's too easy to be myself with you.† She carefully moved my hand back and forth in hers. She was incredibly warm and electricity was throbbing through me. I imagined bringing my lips down her jaw line and then to her unbelievably warm and delicious lips. I sighed internally at the new creature who had broken through all the barriers I had placed to protect this amazing soul next to me. Was she feeling the same desires? I opened my eyes to try and read her expression. Reflections of rainbows were scattered across her face. She looked peaceful. Not being able to hear her thoughts was still taxing. Instantly, I had to know†¦ â€Å"Tell me what you're thinking,† I pleaded. Her eyes swiftly met mine. â€Å"It's still so strange for me, not knowing,† I explained. â€Å"You know, the rest of us feel that way all the time,† she said, her voice acerbic. â€Å"It's a hard life,† I acknowledged. I willed my mind to hear her thoughts in that moment†¦ even a single sound would quench my ever dying thirst for her knowing mind. I realized then that she hadn't told me what was on her mind, â€Å"But you didn't tell me.† She paused for a moment, biting her delicate bottom lip, â€Å"I was wishing I could know what you were thinking†¦Ã¢â‚¬  her voice faltered. I tried to encourage her to continue, â€Å"And?† Her voice accelerated then, â€Å"I was wishing that I could believe that you were real. And I was wishing that I wasn't afraid.† I was grief-stricken instantaneously. â€Å"I don't want you to be afraid,† I spoke the words that were undeniable. I kept my voice soft, pleading. She should be afraid though, she should fear this menacing creature in front of her. She spoke then, bringing me out of my dejection, â€Å"Well, that's not exactly the fear I meant, though that is certainly something to think about.† Without thinking, I propped myself up on my right arm, in a momentum that would have been unsettling to a human, but my Bella didn't move a centimeter. During my movement, my left hand stayed securely in hers. My action had only placed me but a few inches from her glorious face. Electricity exploded in me and it took every fiber of my being not to move those few extra inches and place my lips to her delicate ones. I stared fixedly at her and she was dazzled. â€Å"What are you afraid of, then?† I wondered. She took a deep breath, and then leaned in, inhaling my scent. I took in the sweet air between us into my lungs, too. I was instantly eager. Ecstasy quickly washed over me and I began to lean closer to place my lips against hers. Before she noticed that I had leaned in too, I did the only thing I could to stop my passion from becoming her death and I fled. I was instantly standing in the shade across the meadow. I tried to leave off any expression that would be readable on my face. I didn't want her to see the monster that almost broke free. Which one? I asked myself. She looked around until she spotted me and then met my gaze. Her face displayed many emotions until she finally settled on shocked. I immediately felt like reaching into my chest to calm my still heart. I could tell that I had done something to upset her. â€Å"I'm†¦ sorry†¦ Edward,† she whispered. No mistakes, I ordered to myself. I just needed to tame the beast within. The craving for her body was overwhelming. â€Å"Give me a moment,† I implored. I took one ?C two – three deep breaths, hoping to dispel any lingering lust for her blood. I am dangerous, I know she saw that, but I didn't want her to know this side of me. I looked at her then, keeping her eyes fixed in mine and walked slowly back into the light, a place I knew I didn't belong. I stopped several feet from her now, trying to bridle my flaming desires. I sank to the ground then, never taking my eyes off Bella. I didn't want to miss a single expression. I inhaled the air around me, slowly welcoming back her fragrance. I took another breath, just to reassure myself that I could handle this. No mistakes, I reminded myself, though I already knew I had made too many. With our eyes still fixed, I tried to calm her with a smile, â€Å"I am so very sorry.† How do I make her understand how sorry I am? â€Å"Would you understand what I meant if I said I was only human?† I asked, hoping that she would comprehend what I was trying to explain to her. She nodded once, with just a light twitch of her lips. Was she afraid now? Had I made a mistake so devastating that she would never grace me with her presence again? I could hear how hard her heart was working, trying to get the blood to her body as quickly as possible. I realized then, that I had promised myself that I would show her what I truly am, so she could understand why we shouldn't be together. My smile turned devilish in the thought of what I was going to show her now. â€Å"I'm the world's best predator, aren't I? Everything about me invites you in ?C my voice, my face, even my smell. As if I need any of that!† I bellowed. I ran around the meadow two times at my normal pace to add to my statement, â€Å"As if you could outrun me,† I laughed sharply. I watched her face, she didn't seem convinced that I was a monster yet so I grabbed the closest branch from the tree next to me and snapped it in half like I was breaking a twig. I held it in my hand effortlessly and then threw it so it hit another tree and it broke into several pieces. She looked frightened then, and I was immediately thrown into purgatory. I had to calm her somehow! I went to her in that instant, standing only two feet away, frozen so I wouldn't scare her. â€Å"As if you could fight me off,† I said, tenderly. Her eyes never left mine, and I watched them grow wide during my attempt to persuade her to see the deplorable creature that I am. She didn't run from me, even after she witnessed the things I could do – the things I could do to her, I added. I felt a lump rise in my throat. She wasn't running†¦ why wasn't she running? I could see the terror in her eyes, yet she stayed. I knew how she felt though; I knew I couldn't leave her either. If she were to stay with me, I couldn't bare to witness her terrified expression, â€Å"Don't be afraid,† I said gently, â€Å"I promise†¦Ã¢â‚¬  the words were all wrong, I paused, thinking. How could I promise something I was so unsure of? â€Å"I swear not to hurt you,† I refuted. No mistakes ?C I snapped at my new enemy, desire. I looked at her expression then, and I obviously hadn't convinced her. â€Å"Don't be afraid,† I begged in a whisper. I stepped closer, but I gave myself adequate space from her so that I wouldn't be tempted to grab her around the waist, pull her body close to mine, gently grab her chin and direct her mouth to mine†¦ stop there! While I was spinning my fantasies I realized I was now only a foot away from her face, not knowing how I had gotten there. Keep it together ?C I snapped at myself. Desire had surely taken over. â€Å"Please forgive me,† I begged, â€Å"I can control myself. You caught me off guard. But I'm on my best behavior now.† I tried to persuade myself more than anything. I was beginning to worry about her. Bella hadn't even whimpered or made a single noise since I decided to show her exactly what a vampire was capable of. Hadn't I reassured her that I wouldn't hurt her after my mistake? What else could I say? â€Å"I'm not thirsty today, honestly.† I winked trying to show her she could trust me. She suddenly, and unexpectedly, began laughing. Her silvery bell chime voice shaking slightly. Had she gone mad? Did I finally do something to make her mind snap? Horribly, terrifyingly, I was worried that I had damaged the one person who I loved above all else. â€Å"Are you all right?† I asked delicately. Maybe if I were to try and put us back together again. I placed my hand back in hers and the warmth made me inhale her heady scent while passion and desire started rearing their heads up in approval. She looked down at my hand then, like I had pulled her out of a deep thought. Her eyes slowly rose to meet mine. I was pleading for forgiveness with my eyes, hoping she could see that I was sorry. She looked back at my hand again, like she was checking that it was still there. Suddenly I was shivering in pleasure as her fingers began tracing lines up and down my arm again. She returned her gaze to my face again and smiled apprehensively. Was everything back to normal now? I returned her smile quickly so she would feel reassured. â€Å"So where were we, before I behaved so rudely?† I asked, making sure she realized that I was still sorry for my mistake. â€Å"I honestly can't remember,† she said, and I was grateful for her response. I smiled but the remorse was still plain on my face. â€Å"I think we were talking about why you were afraid, besides the obvious reason.† I reminded her. â€Å"Oh, right,† she paused. â€Å"Well?† I pushed, impatiently. She looked away from me again, and stared fixedly on my hand that she was caressing. She didn't look back up or respond for several seconds. What are you thinking? I asked internally. I was becoming extremely frustrated. â€Å"How easily frustrated I am,† I sighed then. She returned her gaze to my face, still not responding. I wanted to take her into my arms then, but she saved me from making my mistake by finally responding, â€Å"I was afraid†¦ because, for, well, obvious reasons, I can't stay with you. And I'm afraid that I'd like to stay with you, much more than I should.† Her eyes left mine then, returning to our hands. Was she finally admitting what I have been trying to convince her of the whole time? That being with me was dangerous†¦ â€Å"Yes,† I agreed, â€Å"That is something to be afraid of, indeed. Wanting to be with me. That's really not in your best interest.† She frowned then. Was she upset now? What was I doing to this wonderful girl? Will I inevitable kill her? â€Å"I should have left long ago,† I sighed. I was now beginning to think aloud, â€Å"I should leave now. But I don't know if I can.† She pulled me out of my thoughts, â€Å"I don't want you to leave,† she whimpered, looking at our hands again. Why did she have to make everything so difficult? Why did she have to want me as absolutely as I wanted her? â€Å"Which is exactly why I should. But don't worry. I'm essentially a selfish creature. I crave your company too much to do what I should,† I said. I crave more than just her company, I crave her body, her blood, her soft sweet lips†¦ â€Å"I'm glad.† â€Å"Don't be!† I snapped. I pulled my hand from her grip. I couldn't let her go if she was holding onto me. I showed her what kind of a monster I am and she becomes frightened ?C then I try to reassure her that I won't hurt her†¦ What is my problem? I moved my gaze from her face to the forest, knowing I couldn't let her go if I was staring at her, looking into those deep chocolate eyes. â€Å"It's not only your company I crave. Never forget that. Never forget I am more dangerous to you than I am to anyone else.† I realized I had become harsh, and again, I was nervous that I might have hurt her feelings. I heard her heart beating. It was a heavenly sound. She spoke then, â€Å"I don't think I understand exactly what you mean ?C by that last part anyway.† I turned to look at her then; I hadn't expected her to ask this question. I smiled, realizing I never truly explained what her blood does to me. â€Å"How do I explain?† I deliberated, â€Å"And without frightening you again†¦ hmmmm.† My hand was suddenly warm again, and I realized that it had found its way back into her hands. I reached out and placed it there without even giving it my permission. I was distracted immediately, â€Å"That's amazingly pleasant, the warmth.† I sighed. I began thinking of how I could explain what her blood does to me. What could I say that would make it not sound like I was fighting to not drink her blood every second I was around her? It's true, the monster has been clawing less, but that is because my desires to possess her in other ways had become forefront in my mind. Maybe a food analogy? â€Å"You know how everyone enjoys different flavors?† I asked, â€Å"Some people love chocolate ice cream, others prefer strawberry?† She nodded, and I decided that maybe food wasn't the best way to explain this, â€Å"Sorry about the food analogy ?C I couldn't think of another way to explain.† She smiled and I returned it. I mulled over how to explain this craving I have, â€Å"You see, every person smells different, has a different essence. If you locked an alcoholic in a room full of stale beer, he'd gladly drink it. But he could resist, if he wished to, if he were a recovering alcoholic. Now, let's say you placed in that room a glass of hundred-year-old brandy, the rarest, finest cognac ?C and filled the room with its warm aroma ?C how do you think he would fare then?† I tried to explain. I stared fixedly at her then, waiting for her to understand. Alcohol was such a weak comparison. How her blood could ever compare to something so flagrant. At that moment, a light breeze enhanced what I was thinking. Her scent continued to leave a dry dull ache in my throat. She still hadn't answered. â€Å"Maybe that's not the right comparison. Maybe it would be too easy to turn down the brandy. Perhaps I should have made our alcoholic a heroin addict instead.† I decided. I had never drank alcohol or did any type of drug, those things do nothing for me, but I do know what these things could do to a human. My degrees in medicine helped me understand these types of addictions, but my addiction to Bella was still no comparison. â€Å"So what you're saying is, I'm your brand of heroin?† she asked playfully. She always knew what to say to lift my spirits. I smiled at her, â€Å"Yes, you are exactly my brand of heroin.† â€Å"Does that happen often?† she asked me. It doesn't happen often, I have only seen it too clearly in Emmett's mind what happened when he crossed paths with someone who smelled as delicious as Bella does to me. I didn't know how to answer her question without making her fear me more, but maybe she needed another dose of fear, â€Å"I spoke to my brothers about it.† I told her. I looked away from her as I spoke, not wanting to see her reaction to what I was about to tell her, â€Å"To Jasper, every one of you is much the same. He's the most recent to join our family. It's a struggle for him to abstain at all. He hasn't had time to grow sensitive to the differences in smell, in flavor.† I inclined my head in her direction, hoping she would understand I was sorry that I would have to tell her the rest, â€Å"Sorry.† I murmured. â€Å"I don't mind. Please don't worry about offending me, or frightening me, or whichever. That's the way you think. I can understand, or I can try to at least. Just explain however you can,† she commanded me. Silly Bella, I'm always worried about your well being, even your mental health, I thought. I gulped in some of the air around us. Her scent went rushing down my throat and filled my lungs with a burning hunger, emphasizing my explanation, â€Å"So Jasper wasn't sure if he'd ever come across someone who was as,† I hesitated, making sure I'd pick a word that wouldn't scare her, â€Å"appealing as you are to me. Which makes me think not. Emmett has been on the wagon longer, so to speak, and he understood what I meant. He says twice, for him, once stronger than the other.† â€Å"And for you?† â€Å"Never,† I responded. We were both silent then. What was she thinking now? â€Å"What did Emmett do?† she asked. I wished she hadn't asked this question. I clenched my teeth as I remembered what happened just as clearly as Emmett had when he was telling me about his experiences. Of course, the humans didn't survive. Bella will live, I promised myself, because I knew I couldn't live without her now. â€Å"I guess I know,† she said, taking the burden off my shoulders. I looked at her then, wishing she would understand that I didn't want her fate to be like those other humans, that I loved her and would do everything in my power to protect her. I sighed internally; â€Å"Even the strongest of us fall off the wagon, don't we?† the thought was wistful. â€Å"What are you asking? My permission?† she hissed acidly, â€Å"I mean, is there no hope then?† she said softly. She spoke openly about her death, like she would have welcomed it if it came from me. How could she possibly think there was no hope? Hadn't I proven that I was stronger than I was when I first engulfed her fragrance? I was instantly repentant, â€Å"No, no! Of course there's hope! I mean, of course I won't†¦Ã¢â‚¬  take your life, I added mentally. I was gazing into her wide eyes. I wanted to explain to her that I was different then my brother. I just wanted her to understand that there was hope. â€Å"It's different for us. Emmet†¦ these were strangers he happened across. It was a long time ago, and he wasn't as†¦ practiced, as careful, as he is now.† I watched her expressions. She was in deep thought. She bit at her lower lip and instantly I wondered what her lower lip would taste like. She broke through my fantasy before it got out of control, â€Å"So if we'd met†¦ oh, in a dark alley or something†¦Ã¢â‚¬  she left the sentence hanging. I answered without thinking, â€Å"It took everything I had not to jump up in the middle of that class full of children and – † I realized I was about to tell her that I thought about snapping all of their necks and saving her for last so I could enjoy her warm blood alone. I decided to leave some details out, â€Å"When you walked past me, I could have ruined everything Carlisle has built for us, right then and there. If I hadn't been denying my thirst for the last, well, too many years, I wouldn't have been able to stop myself.† I paused, looking into the trees. A scowl ever present on my face by the choice of our topic. I glanced at her and I could see that she was remembering that first meeting, too. â€Å"You must have thought I was possessed,† I said grimly. â€Å"I couldn't understand why. How you could hate me so quickly†¦Ã¢â‚¬  she trailed off. â€Å"To me, it was like you were some kind of demon, summoned straight from my own personal hell to ruin me. The fragrance coming off your skin†¦ I thought it would make me deranged that first day. In that one hour, I thought of a hundred different ways to lure you from the room with me, to get you alone. And I fought them each back, thinking of my family, what I could do to them. I had to run out, to get away before I could speak the words that would make you follow†¦Ã¢â‚¬  the memory bit at my cold heart. Bella's lips had parted then, a little gasp of horror etched into her skin. â€Å"You would have come,† I told her. And she would have. The way Bella flocks towards danger, it would have been very easy. I remembered how I had planned to take her as soon as I got her by myself and grimaced internally. â€Å"Without a doubt,† she replied I removed my eyes from her face then, and frowned down at our hands. I was remembering that first day, â€Å"And then, as I tried to rearrange my schedule in a pointless attempt to avoid you, you were there ?C in that close, warm little room, the scent was maddening. I so very nearly took you then. There was only one other frail human there ?C so easily dealt with.† I felt her tremble and was immediately concerned that I had said too much. Her eyes were blank, like she was remembering something awful, and she trembled again. I was instantly angry with myself for ever making her feel that way. My behavior that first day was something I have tried to forget, but my mind is not like a human's, I retain every last detail of every moment. She didn't speak. â€Å"But I resisted. I don't know how. I forced myself not to wait for you, not to follow you from the school. It was easier outside, when I couldn't smell you anymore, to think clearly, to make the right decision. I left the others near home ?C I was too ashamed to tell them how weak I was, they only knew something was very wrong ?C and then I went straight to Carlisle, at the hospital, to tell him I was leaving.† I explained to her. Of all the things I did that day after I had inhaled the most delicious blood ever, fleeing was the only one I was satisfied with. If I hadn't, surely she would be dead ?C my eyes crimson. I continued my story, â€Å"I traded cars with him ?C he had a full tank of gas and I didn't want to stop. I didn't dare go home, to face Esme. She wouldn't have let me go without a scene. She would have tried to convince me that it wasn't necessary†¦ By the next morning I was in Alaska,† chagrin was etched in my face. I know it was weak to run away, but what else could I have done? Bella sat there, frozen, enveloped in my story. I continued, â€Å"I spent two days there, with some old acquaintances†¦ but I was homesick. I hated knowing I'd upset Esme, and the rest of them, my adopted family. In the pure air of the mountains it was hard to believe you were so irresistible. I convinced myself it was weak to run away. I'd dealt with temptation before, not of this magnitude, not even close, but I was strong. Who were you, an insignificant little girl† ?C I smiled at the fact that I ever thought her insignificant because she was the most significant thing in my world, â€Å"to chase me from the place I wanted to be? So I came back†¦Ã¢â‚¬  I peered into the forest then, remembering how my family surrounded me my first day back at school, afraid I'd still kill her. Bella was speechless. Her fingers were still slowly moving up and down my arm. Telling her this story now, I suddenly felt free. I wanted to explain this to her since the first time I came back to school, to explain the reasons for loathing her so much that first day. I wanted Bella to be acquainted with everything about me. I continued, â€Å"I took precautions, hunting, feeding more than usual before seeing you again. I was sure that I was strong enough to treat you like any other human, I was arrogant about it.† â€Å"It was unquestionably a complication that I couldn't simply read your thoughts to know what your reaction was to me. I wasn't used to having to go to such circuitous measures, listening to your words in Jessica's mind†¦ her mind isn't very original, and it was annoying to have to stoop to that. And then I couldn't know if you really meant what you said. It was all extremely irritating,† I frowned, trying once more to make my mind explore hers with no luck. â€Å"I wanted you to forget my behavior that first day, if possible, so I tried to talk with you like I would with any person. I was eager actually, hoping to decipher some of your thoughts. But you were too interesting, I found myself caught up in your expressions†¦ and every now and then you would stir the air with your hand or your hair and the scent would stun me again†¦ Of course, then you were nearly crushed to death in front of my eyes. Later I thought of a perfectly good excuse for why I acted at that moment ?C because if I hadn't saved you, if your blood had been spilled there in front of me, I don't think I could have stopped myself from exposing us for what we are. But I only thought of that excuse later. At the time, all I could think was, ‘Not her.'† I closed my eyes then, remembering that fateful day; the van rushing towards her, me running to save her. I remembered how I was very afraid I had hurt her†¦ and I remember it was the first time I had held her in my arms, securely to my chest. I was craving to hold her to me again. Bella pulled me from my distraction, â€Å"In the hospital?† she asked. My eyes met hers then, â€Å"I was appalled. I couldn't believe I had put us in danger after all, put myself in your power ?C you of all people. As if I needed another motive to kill you.† I felt a jolt of pain at the thought, and I felt Bella shiver too, â€Å"But it had the opposite effect,† I told her quickly, trying to reassure her, â€Å"I fought with Rosalie, Emmett, and Jasper when they suggested that now was the time†¦ the worst fight we've ever had. Carlisle sided with me, and Alice,† of course, Alice was thinking I would turn her. I frowned at the thought but continued, â€Å"Esme told me to do whatever I had to in order to stay.† I tried to shake the uneasiness I was feeling, because the only way I would stay, was to stop seeing her, and I knew that there was nothing that would prevent me from seeing her, now. The pain I would endure if I were to leave her was inconceivable. â€Å"All that next day I eavesdropped on the minds of everyone you spoke to, shocked that you kept your word. I didn't understand you at all. But I knew that I couldn't become more involved with you. I did my very best to stay as far from you as possible. And every day the perfume of your skin, your breath, your hair†¦ it hit me as hard as the very first day.† My eyes found hers then. My lungs took in the air around us, and the scent was the most delicious fragrant. I took in one more gulp of air and continued, hoping I hadn't scared her off, â€Å"And for all that, I'd have fared better if I had exposed us all that first moment, than if now, here ?C with no witnesses and nothing to stop me ?C I were to hurt you.† I was still irritated at the fact that she hadn't told a single soul that she was spending the day with me. â€Å"Why?† she asked. I didn't understand why she had to ask, didn't she know that it would cause me physical pain to hurt her now, that I loved her more than my own existence? â€Å"Isabella.† I said, letting her know that I was being nothing but serious by saying her full name. I stared into her eyes then, and my hand came up and I carefully ruffled her hair with my free hand. The current of electricity was now going in one hand and out the other, being released and zapping again with our touches, like we were meant to be joined together. â€Å"Bella, I couldn't live with myself if I ever hurt you. You don't know how it's tortured me.† I looked down, away from her gaze because I was abashed. I didn't want the words to exit my mouth, but she had to know, â€Å"The thought of you, still, white, cold†¦ to never see you blush scarlet again, to never see that flash of intuition in your eyes when you see through my pretenses†¦it would be unendurable.† I returned my gaze to her eyes then, â€Å"You are the most important thing to me now. The most important thing to me ever.† At the sound of my words, a craving burst through my chest and it wasn't for her blood, it was for her soul. I wanted to hold this precious soul close to me and never let go. To protect it from anything and everything that would harm it. I continued to stare fixedly upon her face, she had looked down, securing my hand in hers†¦ reaffirming that she felt the same way. She spoke then, â€Å"You already know how I feel, of course. I'm here†¦ which roughly translated, means I would rather die than stay away from you.† Her lips turned down then, â€Å"I'm an idiot.† â€Å"You are an idiot,† I agreed, but I couldn't help but laugh. She met my gaze then and joined in with my laughter. My cold dead heart squeezed in that moment. I felt eager to pull our bodies together, to intertwine them. After everything I confessed today, she still wanted to be with me, she was continually saying yes to me. At that moment, I wanted to confess my feelings for her. I wanted to bring her close to my body and whisper what she meant to me. I finally spoke, â€Å"And so the lion fell in love with the lamb†¦,† I whispered. She looked away then and her cheeks began to flush. â€Å"What a stupid lamb,† she sighed. â€Å"What a sick masochistic lion.† I murmured. I had wondered if she were masochistic before, about not telling anyone we were together today and realized it was me who gained gratification from pain, not her. Every breath, every touch†¦ it was exceedingly painful and fantastic. Every moment of pain I was feeling was pleasurable because I was able to be with her. I continued to seek her out and deny myself a touch. I was the only one who was masochistic here. â€Å"Why†¦?† Bella asked, not finishing her question. She had paused, like she wasn't sure how to finish. Ah, what was she thinking now? I smiled at her expression, â€Å"Yes?† â€Å"Tell me why you ran from me before.† She pleaded. My lips began to turn down then, â€Å"You know why.† â€Å"No, I mean, exactly what did I do wrong? I'll have to be on my guard, you see, so I better start learning what I shouldn't do. This for example† she caressed my hand then and the warmth sent electricity up my spine and down to my toes, â€Å"seems to be all right.† My smile returned. She wanted to make things easier for me because she wanted to be with me. Even after we leave this meadow, she was planning on staying with me. Would I ever get use to this wonderful creature? She needed to understand though, that there wasn't anything she did to make me want to take her life, it was strictly on how delicious she smelled. â€Å"You didn't do anything wrong, Bella. It was my fault.† â€Å"But I want to help, if I can, to not make this harder for you.† She explained. â€Å"Well†¦Ã¢â‚¬  honestly, everything she did made it difficult for me. Her scent ?C her attachment to me – her unreadable thoughts – how she was constantly needing me to save her, it all made it difficult. â€Å"It was just how close you were. Most humans instinctively shy away from us, are repelled by our alienness†¦I wasn't expecting you to come so close. And the smell of your throat.† I was immediately aware that I almost exposed how much I craved everything about her. I looked at her then, making sure I hadn't scared her with what little I told her. â€Å"Okay then,† she replied breezily. She tucked her neck in then, â€Å"No throat exposure.† She said seriously. My laugh was instantaneous. She didn't understand what I was trying to say, â€Å"No, really, it was more the surprise than anything else.† I raised my hand then, trying to prove a point, and placed my hand gently on her soft, warm, neck. In that moment, I pictured doing several things; bringing her closer to me and caressing her striking face, running my hand up through her hair so I could lightly pull her to my lips, bringing my nose to her neck and smell her from her neck to her ear†¦ but I resisted. â€Å"You see, perfectly fine.† I said. I felt her blood pulsing under my palm and her breath coming faster and blowing sweetly into my face. The scent, the sound, it was so appealing. Eagerness ran through me and I was instantly excited. She began to blush a light red color that set her eyes and lips glowing richly with desire. â€Å"The blush on your cheeks is lovely,† I whispered. That insatiable creature, desire, refused to be caged at this point and took over my body. I released my hand from her grasp lightly and watched her hands fall limply into her lap. I reached up; slowly, deliberately gentle to place my hand on her cheek. I held her warm, precious face, in between my hands. I filled my lungs with her luscious scent, and it only sent electricity through my body now, being released slowly into her sweet cheeks from my palms. My passion for her was making me greedy. â€Å"Be very still,† I whispered. I looked deep into her eyes and leaned in to kiss her, to bring my lips to hers and lick her warm skin, but abruptly I changed my mind, not wanting to tempt myself anymore then I already was. I placed my cheek against her neck. It fit there, like it belonged. I didn't know what I was doing, but ecstasy was quickly filling my veins. I continued to breathe in her aroma, and decided I needed a better whiff of what was driving me to crave more and more. I let my hands slide from her neck, just in case I was to make a mistake during my inability to re-cage my desires and snap it. I slowly brought my face closer to her collarbone and my nose lightly brushed her skin. She trembled then. The thought of what I was doing to her sent spasms of pleasurable electricity through my body and I inhaled one quick breath and held it for only a second longer than normal before releasing the air. The fragrance left a dull ache in my throat, but it was second to my new desires now. I continued to move my head and finally rested against her chest, making sure that each touch was calculated so I wouldn't damage her. Her heart was still racing under the tender membrane of her skin. â€Å"Ah,† I sighed. I continued to listen to her heart. Sometimes it skipped a beat, and a few times it stopped all together. After an immeasurable moment her pulse slowed, and I realized in that moment that it was the most significant sound in my life. She never moved, but all too soon I was releasing her. I had brought her to me and didn't hurt her. â€Å"It won't be so hard again,† I said with resolution. â€Å"Was that very hard for you?† she asked. â€Å"Not nearly as bad as I imagined it would be. And you?† I asked, still curious if I were what she really wanted, if what I did was something she wanted. â€Å"No, it wasn't bad†¦for me.† She said timidly. I grinned. Of course it wasn't hard for her†¦and I know it wasn't bad, either. â€Å"You know what I mean.† She said ruefully, and then smiled. My face was warm from being against her for so long, â€Å"Here,† I said, placing her hand against my cheek, â€Å"Do you feel how warm it is?† Electricity flowed through our touch. Suddenly, she whispered, â€Å"Don't move.† I froze. I closed my eyes then, and settled into being a statue. I could smell the air being stirred close to my face and suddenly she was touching my cheek, her warm hand rubbing up and down my face, like she had been doing with my arm. I wanted to pull her into my chest, and I wanted to push her away. I didn't want to do something I would regret and she was making it amazingly hard to say no to her now. Her finger tips moved from my chin to my eyelids. Her fingers traced around my eyes, down my nose and then she reached my lips. Pleasure washed over me. The bliss of her touch had me begging for more. I parted my lips then, sucking in the air of the warm aroma that was her hand. She dropped her hand then, this time I was instantly upset, wanting her to continue. I opened my eyes and she looked into them. Her pulse picked up again. â€Å"I wish†¦I wish you could feel the†¦ complexity†¦the confusion†¦I feel. That you could understand,† I whispered. I reached up to gently move a strand of her hair away from her face. I remembered when Mike had done this, she seemed repulsed. Now, she was just as eager as I was. â€Å"Tell me,† she barely made a noise, it was mostly a wisp of a breath. â€Å"I don't think I can. I've told you, on the one hand, the hunger ?C the thirst ?C that deplorable creature that I am, I feel for you. And I think you can understand that, to an extent. Though,† I grinned half heartily, â€Å"as you are not addicted to any illegal substances, you probably can't empathize completely. But†¦Ã¢â‚¬  I brought my fingers to her lips and watched her shiver under my touch, a shiver of pleasure, emphasizing my next words, â€Å"There are other hungers. Hungers I don't even understand, that are foreign to me.† She responded quickly, â€Å"I may understand that better than you think.† Did she understand? There was no way she could understand my feelings, but maybe she did, maybe it is because it is so new to me that I think she wasn't feeling them too. Maybe this was something that was more human than vampire. â€Å"I'm not used to feeling so human. Is it always like this?† â€Å"For me?† she asked, but answered before I could tell her to continue, â€Å"No, never. Never before this.† I held her hands securely in mine, making sure that I was gentle; constantly afraid I would use too much force and break her. â€Å"I don't know how to be close to you.† I confessed, â€Å"I don't know if I can.† She took charge then, slowly moving her face closer to mine. She kept her eyes on mine until she couldn't see me anymore. She had placed her head against my chest now. I continued to breathe slowly. â€Å"This is enough,† she sighed. Before I understood my own actions, desire reared up and took control. I wrapped my arms around her, enveloping her, making sure my grip was not too strong, but was secure enough to show her that she could count on me to protect her. I brought my face to her hair and took in a large breath or her heady scent. Thirst broke free then, but the two creatures, hunger and desire fought, and desire won. â€Å"You're better at this than you give yourself credit for,† she noted. â€Å"I have human instincts ?C they may be buried deep, but they're there.† I explained to her. My desire was refusing to let her go, and she didn't struggle against my tender grasp. After several long, but not long enough, moments, she sighed. I looked to the forest and realized the sun slanted at a different angle. â€Å"You have to go,† I told her. â€Å"I thought you couldn't read my mind,† she mocked. â€Å"It's getting clearer,† I responded playfully, my lips turning up. I released her, only to grasp her shoulders, â€Å"Can I show you something?† I asked. I wanted her to understand me more, and one way to do that was to show her exactly how I travel. â€Å"I'll show you how I travel in the forest.† She looked apprehensive, â€Å"Don't worry, you'll be safe, and we'll get to your truck much faster.† I grinned widely and I heard her heart skip a beat. She looked at me then, a smile in her voice, â€Å"Will you turn into a bat?† she asked. I laughed so loud that I was sure it could have been heard for some distance. â€Å"Like I haven't heard that one before!† I scoffed. â€Å"Right, I'm sure you get that all the time,† she replied, still playful. â€Å"Come on, little coward, climb on my back.† I suppressed a laugh. Her eyes became wide and she hesitated. I became impatient and grabbed for her, making sure I was gentle. Her heart beat speed up and I could smell her pulse hammering. I placed her on my back and she engulfed me. He body wrapped around me and I could feel the heat emitting from her. She embraced me fiercely. â€Å"I'm a bit heavier than your average backpack,† she cautioned. She was light as a feather to me, almost like she wasn't there, but she was, because I could feel her warmth and her beating pulse. â€Å"Hah!† I rolled my eyes then. This day had turned out better than I have ever believed imaginable. I hadn't hurt her, or killed her, instead her scent was becoming less sensitive and I had been able to let my desires take control and I held her in my arms, I caressed her face and brought my mouth so close to the base of her neck without biting. I grabbed her hand that was wrapped tightly around my neck and pressed her palm into my nose, inhaling as deeply as possible. The ache burned in my throat. I was still thirsting for her blood, but desire bounded up and out my mouth, â€Å"Easier all the time.† I took off through the forest.